So.

My camera's broke...so it'll be awhile before I'm able to post some of my amazing pictures.Soon,I`ll upload something.

I also hooked up my new computer,seeing as my old one wouldn`t turn on.So I can`t even upload old,crappy pictures,because their all on my old computer.WHICH WON`T TURN ON.*mad*
Oh,and I`m going for another assesment at my local hospital because I`m apparently schizo.I don`t feel shizo.This sucks,as if I don`t have enough mental problems.

Lastly,I found this explanation of sociopathy in DEVILUSHNINJA`s journal.Enjoy.




ANTISOCIAL PERSONALITY DISORDER(Sociopath)


The behavior of a sociopath is so close to normal it is extremely hard to diagnose.The diagnoses of a sociopath is extremely difficult because they have so many mental problems to contend with the complete diagnoses might not occur.If a person is diagnosed with Anti-Social Personality Disorder it is very hard to treat them and there is no cure for their behavior.The sociopath is very intelligent and knows how to manipulate people into thinking they are normal and that is when they work their magic.Beneath the mask of sanity a sociopath is full of tension,hostility,irritability,rage,emptiness and sadness at the core of the sociopathic personality.Sociopaths derive strong,yet non perverse gratification from harming others.When a sociopath is attacking someone they will inflict more pain if the victim fights back.They like to hurt,frighten,tyrannize,bully,and manipulate.They do it for a sense of power and control,and will often only drop subtle hints about what they are up to.They polish their aggressive,domineering manner in such a way to disguise any intimidation others might feel.A sociopath gets great gratification in the act of hurting someone for absolutely no reason.The sociopath will in most cases become violent and abuse drugs and alcohol to facilitate the violent behavior.The violence in many cases is the result of sub-conscious decisions that might lead to murdering or assaulting someone for no reason.The lack of moral development lets the person feel no guilt or pain for what they did and quite possibly feel great about their actions.When they hurt a person a sociopath might think they had it coming.When a sociopath is punished they have no feeling of regret because no matter how cruel or selfish the behavior is,they feel it is justified.Everything and everybody else is mentally twisted around in their minds as objects to be used in fulfilling their own needs and desires.They often believe they are doing something good for society,or at least nothing that bad.Their style is to systematically go about sabotaging the ideas of others to get their ideas in place.They are usually effective at getting their way,and are especially vindictive if resisted or crossed.A sociopath is a person that acts against society and their sole purpose it seems is to act against the law.They especially enjoy and take pride in bending or breaking the rules.They live in a shell.They have a cold,callous attitude toward human suffering or any social problem in the society they live in.They just don't care because it's outside their range of empathy.Most will believe they are justified in this because they feel they were cheated in some way themselves by society,and a few will be more than happy to rant and rave about it to anyone who listens.Underneath it all,they would like to see nothing better than all of society destroyed.They seem to continually fall upon bad luck and bad companions,however,While they will complain that none of this is their fault,behind it all is a kind of self-defeating mechanism in the poor choices they made themselves.A sociopath has little self regard for themselves and pays little attention to their own personal safety.They are not ashamed by the same things most of the population would be ashamed of,taking pleasures and gratifying impulses at every opportunity.They have quite active sex lives.They will show more emotion toward their pet or a personal artifact than toward a person.They tend to have short lasting relationships if they are capable of having a relationship at all.As a spouse the sociopath can be glib,superficial,manipulative,dishonest,abusive and unfaithful.Dating and marriage relationships will be very barren and empty.They have superior intellect,but don't do well in school,because of a lack of interest and never seem to break out of low-paying dead-end jobs.Nevertheless,they seem genuinely happy with their lives,unburdened by any sense of negative self-worth or the fact that they have not been a functional,contributing member of society.It's common to refer to them as unsocialized,but the dissocial sociopath does socialize to the mores and values of a dissocial out group,like a gang.Sociopaths identify and hold an allegiance with a dissocial,outcast,or predatory subculture,as long as it runs counter to established authority.They are capable of intense loyalty within these subcultures.A sociopath may look tough and resilient but is usually very fragile and can erupt very easily.They may be more cruel than crazy,they may be choosing not to control their urges,they know right from wrong,they know exactly what they're doing,and they are definitely NOT insane.The one thing that all sociopaths have in common is that they are "too much" for anyone to handle.


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And now,a quiz.


1. When was the last time you cried?
When I was 5.


2. Have you ever faked sick?
countless times



3. What was the last lie you said?
I told my mom I felt fine when I wasn`t.OH GOD I`M GOING TO HELL FOR THAT!IM SUCH A SINNER
(joke)


4. Have you ever cried during a movie?
No



5. Who was the last person you couldn't take your eyes off of?
Some guy in the emergency room missing an arm,there was blood gushing from the wound,I wanted to go poke it.

6. Have you ever danced in the rain?
At the beginning of the school year,I felt clean afterwords.


7. Have you ever been drunk?
No,but I`ve acted drunk to complete strangers.I got 20 bucks for it.

8. Have you ever tried tried drugs?
Perscription drugs for my mental issues,other than that no,and I never will.


9. Do you smoke?
With all the second hand smoking,no thanks to my family,I might as well.


10. What's the farthest you've ever gone on a dare?
My friend and I once followed old men on a bus and asked them if we could blow them off when they got off the bus.They all ran off,although this one guy looked as if he wanted to say yes.

I got $20 dollars for that dare.


11. What is your full name?
Chloe(I hate my name,call me Jenn or Kira)Alexandra Elizabeth Evelyn Oldenhof.


12. What is your blood-type?
Vampire.
Or Evil,either one really,they both fit.


13. Have you ever been in a car accident?
Once.Almost.



14. How old were you when you received your first kiss?
when I was born/12


15. Who was your first kiss?
my father/I`m not telling.


16. Have you ever had an online relationship?
of course.


17. Have you ever had phone-sex?
haha,very funny.


18. Have you ever been rejected by a crush?
Yea.


19. What is your favorite sport to play?
ballet?


20. Have you ever made a prank phone call?
countless times.


21 Have you ever said
...Um yes?


22. What's your favorite childhood memory
all my dance recitals and plays are my favorites,as well as christmases and birthdays.


23. Is there anything that you have done that you regret?
hell yes.


24. What do you want to be when you grow up?
a rockstar/actress/fashion designer.
If I don`t make it big,then a CSI
(Warrick is so hot)


25. What is your political persuasion?
Politics are for fags


26. Have you ever had cyber-sex?
fuck no.


27. Do you believe in god?
Their may be a higher power,but I don`t think it cares about us at all.


28. Do you believe in love at first sight?
No.


29. Do you believe in karma?
I don`t believe/care about such trivial things as karma.


30. Who was your first crush?
Blues Clues.

I shit you not.

I wanted to marry Blue and have green furred puppy-children.

It was horrific.

I guess thats when I found out I was bisexual seeing as blues a girl..I think.

31. Who do you have a crush on?
Billy K. from Tokio Hotel.
And Jared Leto.


32. How would you describe yourself?

Glib
Deceitful
Impulsive
Superficial
Manipulative
Irresponsible
Easily annoyed
Easily angered
Lack of remorse
Lack of empathy
Easily frustrated
Constantly irritable
Disregards social norms
Have a grandiose self image
Incapable of experiencing guilt
Disregards the rights of other people
Shows callous unconcern from other's feelings
Blame others or rationalize antisocial behavior


33. What are you afraid of?
Getting locked up in a hospital for the rest of my life,being another homeless person with mental issues,hospitals.

34. Are you religious?
I don`t believe in trivial things like religion.I don`t have the time nor patience for such faith.

35. What does your screen name mean?
I like pugs.Thats all their is to it.


36. What person do you trust the most?
My imaginery friends lol.
My pug Bruno.I would do anything for him.
As for people,my bff Julia I guess.

37. Who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend?
I don`t feel comfortable answering this....lol seriously it was a kid from gr.5/6 named Micheal Abernathy.

38. What is the best compliment you have ever received?
My dance teacher saying what a great dancer I am.
And the compliments for the plays I`ve been in.And my parents/friends when I play my guitar/sing.



39. What is the meanest thing anyone has said about you?
Anything Janelle Gray has said to me.I was mean back to her.
I seriously regret not killing her.Or atleast cutting out her tongue

40. What is the longest crush/relationship you have had?
Micheal Abernathy.I crushed on him for a long time,And then we went out for like,a month, before I moved to Toronto.I actually wasn`t that sad.


41. What is your greatest strength?
I guess how I don`t let things bother me.Or how I don`t take crap form people.

42. What is your greatest weakness?
Lack of Control/Impulsivness/Anger.

43. What is your perfect pizza?
Vegetarian


44. What is your first thought when waking up in the morning?
I really need to kill somebody.


45. What is your last thought before you go to bed?
I kind of reflect on how my day has been,so a bunch of stuff.


46. What college do you want to go to?
Any college/university for fashion design,vet,or forensic studies.


47. Do you get along with your family?
my mom and dad,yeah.


48. Do you play any instruments?
Guitar and Violin.


49. What kind of music do you like?
my tastes vary,anything from jazz to R&B.
Anything that isn`t country I guess.


50. Do you think you're attractive?
No,but I don`t really care about such shallowness.


51. Would you ever get a tattoo?
Yes,I want writing on the back of my net,the inside of my right thigh,skeletal hands gripping the back of both thighs,a star and heart on both sides of my lower stomach,one on my hip,2 on my upper back and a bucnh on my arms.

I also want my feet tattooed like converse hi-tops.

52. How many piercings do you have?
2 in my left ear,4 in my right,one on my lip,and one on my nose.
Hopefully im getting another nose or lip piercing.
I want my eyebrow pierced as well.


53. Who makes you laugh?
it depends on how I`m feeling.


54. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?
Billy K.
Or a vampire,so long as they turn me into one to.


55. Have you ever seen a dead body?
yes,it wasn`t that bad,seeing as they had a heart attack.


56. Do you have a celebrity crush?
of course.




57. What is one thing scientists should invent?
Something to enable people to turn into whatever animaléthign they want at will.


58. Have you ever broken a bone?
a few.


59. What happens after you die?
Do I look like the master of time and space to you?


60. Do you watch or read the news?
sometimes.


61. What stereotype would you label yourself as being?
Goth


62. Would your friends agree with that stereotypic label?
Fuck Yes


63. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
Kira or something catchy,like SmokeScreen or SprayPaint.

64. If you could go back in time to one point in your life, where would you go?
Thats kinda hard to choose,anywhere where I screwed up I guess.


65. If you could change anything about yourself, what would you change?
My entire appearence.


66. Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
No,and I don`t plan to either.


67. Have you ever played strip poker?
No.


68. Would you ever lie to someone to make them feel good about themselves?
No.
*evil*


69. What do you want your friends to think about you?
That I`m the most amazing person ever.
Most of them do,I think.

70. Whats the biggest argument you've ever gotten into?
My parents about their seperation.


71. Have you ever bitten someone?
lots of times.


72. When's your birthday?
May 20th

HOSHIT MY BIRTHDAYS IN A WEEK!


73. Have you ever stolen anything?
fuck yea.


74. Do you make wishes on shooting stars?
I used to.When I was like,3



75. Whats the most you've ever eaten in one sitting?
I never eat much,my gut is small.And currently,anything I eat I puke back of again.


76. If you could go back and change one day, what would it be?
That would take alot of time and patience-which I don`t have-to try and decipher this question.

77. Do you remember your dreams?
Always


78. Have you ever been in love?
yes,hasn`t everyone?


79. Are you a morning person or a night person?
I am a blood thirsty creature of the night.


80. Do you have any phobias?
yes.


81. What's the meanest thing you've ever done to someone?
see question 76


82. Have you ever been to the hospital (other then birth?)
hells yea


83. How many screen names do you have?
BILLIONS.OF BRAZILLIONS.


84. Do any medical problems run in your family?
Cancer.ADD,all the bad ones of course.


85. Have anyone ever been disowned from your family?
I don`t think so.


86. Have you ever had a nightmare?
Who hasn`t?!


87. Do you say meaner things to your friends or your enemies?
enemies of course.

88. Would you ever participate in a threesome?
fuck no.

89. Would you ever pay for a prostitute?
HARHAR.


90. Have you ever mooned or flashed someone?
I`ve mooned someone with my underwear still on.


91. Have you ever cheated on your bf/gf?
no.


92. Have you ever laughed so hard you peed in your pants?
No.


93. Have you ever written a love letter?
no.


94. Have you ever attempted suicide?
once,but I hated it,its fuckin pathetic and a waste.
I will never commit suicide.


95. Do you prefer boxers or briefs?
briefs on guys lol.
But I like B0xz0rz lol.


96. Have you ever been in a fistfight?
hell yea.


97. Do you have any hidden talents?
I`m quite flexible.And I have a knack for playing the guitar.

98. What is one thing you want me to know about you?
That I can kill and will kill you and I will not feel bad or guilty about it.


99. What is one question you wouldn't want me to ask?
That would take forever tro explain.


100. Do you usually prefer books or movies?
it varies.

101. Who is your favorite person to talk to?
my best frundz for evz.
or my pug.


102. Who is always able to cheer you up when you're sad?
my pug,and my bff Briar.


103. Would you ever have sex before marriage?
I don`t see myself ever getting married,but I don`t really care,I will be perfectly content to die a virgin.

104. Who do you talk to most on the phone?
I hate phones.If I had a cellphone I`d probably call my bff Julia.or my bff Briar


105. Do you have a secret that you're ashamed of?
Kindof...


106. Do you prefer British or American spelling of words?
I lprefer how my country-Canada-
spells things.
SOTHAR

107. Have you ever gotten detention?
fuck yea.


108. How do you vent your anger?
I scream,draw/imagine violent things,or I rant about it on youtube.


109. Have you ever been on a diet?
I currently am on one

110. Would you ever date someone younger than you? Older than you?
um,yea?


111. Is your best friend a virgin?
I thionk so lol


112. What's a rumor someone has spread about you?
that I`m a hoe,among others,I get them back though.


113. What's the kinkiest thing you could ever actually see yourself as doing?
Bondage?


114. What's the meanest thing anyone has ever done to you?
That would take a long time to explain.

115. What's the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you?
Buying me stuff?


116. Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness?
Yes.I have Sociopathy,Social Anxiety Disorder,some anger disease I forget the name of,and My mom thinks I`m schizo.

OI.


117. Have you ever cut yourself on purpose?
yes,it hurt.


118. Have you ever wanted to murder someone?
holyshit yes.

I got it all planned out.


119. Have you ever hated someone?
There's always someone I hate


120. Do you prefer talking on the phone or online?
Online


121. Do you consider yourself popular?
Rememrable/infamous.


122. Would you ever tell the person you have a crush on that you like them?
maybe,if they like me back.


123. Have you ever had a crush on an enemy?
no.

124. Have you ever had a crush on a best friend?
yes,I still do lol.


125. What is your favorite book?
Too many to name.


126. Do you have a collection of anything?
Beanie Babies.


127. Are you happy with the person you are becoming?
ugh no.


128. Are you a different person now then you were 5 years ago?
Obviously yes.


129. What do you see yourself as being in 5 years from now?
A ROCK STAR PLZKTHNX


130. Are you happy with the life you have?
No,not really.

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